‘Don’t judge a book before you read it’

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Posted January 28, 2022 | By James Blevins
james@ocalagazette.com

Cantobie Robinson said he feels lonely before falling asleep at night.

No matter where he lays his head down, he said, the last feeling to settle inside of it before sleep mercifully takes over is loneliness.

“That is my biggest fear,” said Robinson, a homeless man who lives in Ocala. “That I will always be alone.”

Robinson, 42, is originally from Arkansas, but likes to think of himself more as a “world traveler,” having “bebopped” around the country for a number of years.

“I did that for a long time,” he said. “But you can only do it for so long before you need somewhere to call home.”

He first discovered Ocala in 2009, which is also when he first met his wife.

The young couple moved from Florida to Philadelphia in May of 2010, got married and started dreaming of adding to their family—then tragedy struck. Their first child was stillborn.

“Her name was Kristen Ashlynn Riley, born November 13, 2010,” said Robinson. “We had our first living daughter, Adrianna Mackenzie, on November 15, 2012.”

He and his wife have another daughter as well named Delaney Destiny.

In 2016, more heartbreak came for Robinson when his wife told him that she had met and fallen in love with someone else.

“I told myself that if I loved her then I had to respect that,” said Robinson, who, brokenhearted, moved homeless back to Ocala shortly after the split. “I’m not on probation. No parole violation. Nothing is keeping me here. But I have started over so many times I just don’t want to do it no more.”

“I chose to come back here to figure out my own life,” he added, referring to Ocala as his “big backyard.”

Life didn’t start ideally for Robinson, he admitted. He grew up with a distinct set of disadvantages.

“Never knew Mom and Dad. But I have met my father, and I do respect him because the Bible tells me to,” he said. “I stayed with my grandma all my life. No brothers, no sisters. I got a bunch of cousins, but we live totally different lives.”

Currently, Robinson works at various pool halls and pubs downtown off the Square or along Hwy 200, busing tables and whatever else needs doing. He said he’d much rather work for his living than ask for anything from anybody else.

“Whatever I do with my hard-earned money then that’s kind of like between me and God,” said Robinson. “But I will ask for work before I try to ask for somebody’s dollar or change. Because I know they got a family to support.”

In contrast to the last thing that enters his mind before sleep every night, Robinson said the first thought that comes when he wakes up every morning, no matter where, is to create a list. He adds to the list everything that he is grateful for. He continues like that throughout the day.

Some days, the list is long and full of good advice for himself and others. Other days, the list isn’t long at all. But Robinson never forgets the list in his head, and the reason it’s important to wake up every day and always make one.

He shared some of his “list” thoughts from the day of his interview: “Don’t judge a book before you read it. To the young ones, please go to school and listen to your parents. If you haven’t got parents, please listen to yourself, you know it’s true, finish school.”

He shared what he hopes to convey to any and all future readers of his story.

“I promise I’m trustworthy,” said Robinson. “I swear I will not take your kindness for weakness.”

“I was heartbroken once, confused, but I’m no different than anyone else,” he said. “Thank you for listening.”

Editors’ note: This is the second of an on-going series of profiles meant to humanize the homeless within the City of Ocala. Through this series, we hope to put a human face on an issue that is often “otherized” or simply pushed out of sight.