Abe’s gift

[Courtesy of Lindsey Kemp]

When one family was struck by unimaginable tragedy, they couldn’t imagine why they would lose their child so unexpectedly. What helped ease their grief was the knowledge that their son’s death provided a gift so that others may live.

Alexander “Abe” Everts, 5, was pulled from a swimming pool at his home on Northeast 12^th Avenue on April 17. He died April 25 at UF Health Shands Hospital. In arguably the hardest moments of their lives, Abe’s parents, Alexander Everts and Lindsey Kemp, made the courageous decision to donate his organs so that other people may receive much-needed transplants.

“I had an opportunity to save some kids and save another parent from feeling like how I’m feeling with the worst thing I’ve ever experienced,” Kemp said. “There was just no other option but to just do it. It’s the right thing. It’s an opportunity to have his legacy live on.

Abe’s heart, liver and kidneys were successfully transplanted to four different people in need.

Abe’s donation took place on April 25, during National Donate Life Month and National Pediatric Transplant Week.

Everts, Abe’s father, offered advice for other parents in the wake of his loss.

“I’d implore people to be present in your kids’ lives,” he said. “As a parent, I understand how frustrating things get…just to let go the hard moments and hold your kids tight.”

Even with his son’s gift to others, Everts said nothing can ease the pain of such a loss.

“If it helps one person check the organ donor box at the DMV,” he said. “I know it’s good; it just hurts.”

In the operating room, Everts and Kemp had the chance to have their words read aloud to the surgical team before the organ harvesting procedure began.

“When (Abe) was born I thought he would save the world. As he grew to be special, I knew that had changed some, but I loved him even harder,” Everts wrote. “He saved my world, and that was good enough for me. Save their worlds. Save their families. Maybe, through them…he shall still save the world after all.”

Kemp said she wants to remember her son’s personality, cherish the impact he had on her life and ensure that his legacy lives on.

“He was just always so gentle and kind and happy,” Kemp said. “He was just the sweetest kid.”

Abe was autistic and nonverbal, and at 5 he had not met a lot of a neurotypical child’s typical benchmarks. Instead, he passed a number of milestones of his own that were special for their family, Kemp said.

“Abe was never able to communicate verbally with us but that made the ways he did communicate all the more meaningful. Each smile, each hand hold, each hug, each time his eyes would find yours—those things spoke very, very loudly to anyone he wanted to hear him,” Kemp wrote to the surgeons.

Abe loved to watch “Sesame Street,” and owned a number of collectible toys and wore pajamas and clothes from his favorite show, the family said.

“It was always about the simple moments with him, like he just loved to go Publix and ride in the ‘car’ shopping carts…we went to the park all the time because he just loved to swing,” Kemp said. “He just really found so much happiness in the tiniest everyday things.”

Abe is survived by his 19-month-old sister Elizabeth “Eve” Everts. The parents chose Abe and his sister’s nicknames based off of the initials of their full names, Alexander Bernard Everts and Elizabeth Victoria Everts, A.B.E. and E.V.E.

“He was just carefree, and very brave,” Everts said. “He hadn’t a care in the world and was just the happiest kid, he was really sweet as can be.”

In the coming months, Kemp said she will learn more information about who received Abe’s heart, liver and kidneys in lifesaving transplants. At a great cost, Abe’s gift allowed for other families to hold their loved ones tight.

“Even in my darkest moments, the grief is just like a side effect of having gotten lucky enough to love him and be loved by him,” Kemp said.

To donate to Abe’s family, visit gofund.me/697a3456 or donate to the Ronald McDonald House of North Central Florida.

To learn more about becoming an organ donor, visit organdonor.gov/sign-up